The Rector's Column - June 2025

Dear Brothers and Sisters,  

These days it seems very common for reporters and bloggers to try and set someone up for a “gotcha” moment. The idea is to direct the conversation towards a question that the subject cannot answer in any positive way at all. It’s meant to catch them and frame them in some sort of inescapable failure. It’s meant for drama and to gain followers. However, it’s also something many people have experienced in various aspects of life. Perhaps you’ve had a job where you were quickly called out for mistakes and corrected in various ways – sometimes publicly, but rarely or never commended. Others were raised in a home where criticism and correction were spoken and punished, but success passed over. 

Sadly, sometimes churches can develop a similar atmosphere where we are quick with expectations and with criticism or to express disappointment. I don’t think it’s malicious or even conscious. There are times we have an expectation that “everyone knows” how something is supposed to be done, or by whom. As Christians, we expect that people will be servants and give their best. We also know that we are to give of ourselves as an expression of service to the Lord, even with-out expectations of thanks or praise. This is sort of true, however. In 1 Corinthians 12, Paul reminded the parish that they needed to value one an-other. In the next chapter – one we often use at weddings – he tells them how important (more than the spectacularity” of their spiritual gifts) love is within the church and its worship life. 

This is an echo of God’s own love and grace for us. While there are many passages of warning and correction in scripture, there are also many that speak of God’s love and mercy. One way to express our love for one another is with affirmation and thanks. That is, we see what people are doing and say something in response. 

Over the last few years, there have been a number of “challenge” trends on social media (for example, dumping cold water over oneself and recording it). I have a challenge for us. It is a “gotcha” challenge. I’m not suggesting you record and post it to social media. In-stead, begin with an attitude of awareness of what people are doing that blesses you and/or blesses the church. This can be those who are in some sort of specific ministry or employ, but especially just in our regular interactions. I want you to “catch” someone doing the right thing, helping out, doing a good job, blessing you or someone else, holding a door open, taking out the trash, making room in a pew, etc., etc., etc. When you catch them, thank them. Express gratitude to one another. Give some praise to someone, especially those who are often “in the background.” I am so grateful to be part of a loving parish family that values one another. Even here, we can grow in our practice of giving thanks and encouragement. Let thanks come from our mouths be-fore criticism or correction. Choose to be a spring of blessing (James 3:8-12). Let the Lord use your mouth to bless and encourage your sisters and brothers!  

The Lord be with you,  +Fraser  

The Rt. Rev. Fraser Lawton, Rector and Assistant Bishop, Diocese of Dallas